Miscarriage is a common but often devastating event that affects between 10 and 20 percent of all pregnancies. The numbers may be even higher due to many miscarriages occurring in the early days before a woman realizes she is pregnant. Defined as the loss of a pregnancy before week 20, miscarriage occurs for a variety of reasons, but often the reason cannot be found.
The good news is, many women who have had a miscarriage can go on to carry a healthy pregnancy to term. When you do become pregnant again, you may find that your feelings and emotions have been affected by your previous loss. This is normal, and you can find ways to cope.
Feelings and emotions after a miscarriage
Recent research suggests that if you are healthy and your physician hasn’t found any problems, you can begin to try and get pregnant again after you’ve had one normal period. For some women, this is encouraging news. However, others may not feel ready for another pregnancy just yet, and may need time to grieve the loss of their baby.
Every woman deals with the loss of a pregnancy differently. If you are feeling sad, confused, or even angry about your loss, find someone you trust with whom you can talk. A miscarriage can be a very intense loss for women and their partners, so trying to ignore your feelings of grief may make you feel worse in the long term.
Getting pregnant again
Once you do get pregnant again, your emotions may be very different than they were before your loss. Some women feel very anxious about losing the baby again, and may be nervous or scared. This is normal, but try to remember that you have a very good chance of having a healthy baby this time. Some women experience feelings of guilt, even though the miscarriage was out of their control. Others may not want to get excited about the baby and may hold on to thoughts of “what if it happens again” throughout the pregnancy, which may lessen their happiness and enjoyment.
Some women don’t want to tell people about the pregnancy, fearing that they may have to “un-tell” them later if a miscarriage should happen again. Choose the time that feels right for you to share your news with others. Perhaps you want to tell one close friend or family member right away, so they can help and support you. Then, you can tell the extended family and friends later, when you feel more comfortable.
However you are feeling about your pregnancy, your feelings are important and should be respected. Don’t let anyone tell you to “just move on” or that you shouldn’t worry about it. Even if you already have other children at home, a miscarriage is a loss that you must deal with in your own way — throughout your next pregnancy and beyond. If you need additional help and support, ask your health care provider about counseling, or you may choose to look into online support groups.
CarePoint Health Family Birth Centers
CarePoint Health is dedicated to providing you with the individual care and attention you need so you can relax and focus on what is most important — the birth of your new baby. Contact us today to learn more about our obstetrics and maternity services.
Content on our website is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. If you are experiencing a medical emergency, please call 911. Always consult your physician before making any changes to your medical treatment.